A few years ago, I was at a wedding with a married friend and she was telling me about her honeymoon. Like many couples, they did an all-inclusive on an island. It sounded like it was wonderful for them. They were so exhausted from the wedding that all they wanted to do was lay around on a beach and decompress. She suggested doing somethig similar if I ever got married.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, I was perusing a wedding blog a few days ago and stumbled upon one couple’s Italian honeymoon plans. They were planning on traveling to a new city every other day. I felt exhausted just looking at it. I wanted to tell them that they were going to miss out on so much. But they seemed to think the pace was perfect for them and that's all that matters!

Now that we are in the throes of wedding planning, honeymoon planning has become a bit of a haven--even though it has been stressful in its own way at times. We knew that an all-inclusive wasn't our style, as stress-free as it may be. Neither of us want to lay on a beach all day for a week. We also have no interest in cruises or hopping from hotel to hotel (or city to city). So we’re doing it our way.

I won’t reveal where we are going just yet. Most of our ducks are in a row, but I’d rather keep it a secret for awhile longer. I started to think that a honeymoon series for couples like us might be a good idea, though.

There’s a lot of pressure for honeymoons to be extra special, or extravagant, or exciting, or quirky, or off-the-beaten-path, etc., etc. It seems more and more like your honeymoon should make other people go “oooooh!” when you tell them about it. As nice as that may be, that’s not the point of honeymoons. A honeymoon is not about the destination as much as it is about the couple. It’s a time to run off, be together, let the whole wedding experience sink in, and celebrate a new adventure together. That should be the most important focus.

So that’s where you start. Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? How do you like to travel? That’s your compass for this and any trip. Forget the "shoulds" and the "this is what we dids" for now and focus on brainstorming what will make you happy.

My goal for this series is to be part trip planning advice, part blog of our experiences, and part inspiration. I’ll be back on Friday with a list of places we thought would make great honeymoon destinations.

Note: I'm of the mind that planning a honeymoons isn't all that different from vacations except, maybe, for some extra romance. So my hope is that anyone planning a vacation will find this series useful, too.